FAQ
Frequently asked questions are a little tricky, because really, I don’t know that a lot of people ask very many questions about counseling (not that they don’t have them, they just don’t get asked) – so these are the questions I think you might ask, or at least might like to read the answers to – and of course, if you have any real questions that I can post and answer on my FAQ, please submit them!
So… few to start with…
Q: What happens at our first session?
A: First I’ll have you fill out some paperwork – one piece is a disclosure form, basically a few pages about me, about your rights as a client, how I work, our arrangement for fees, appointments, etc. You’ll also fill out some information about yourself (and/or your child) – which includes questions such as age, school or occupation, who is in your family, who lives in your home, medications, previous experiences in counseling, and why you are coming to see me (either for yourself or for your child). Depending on the situation I may also ask you to fill out a Release of Information (ROI), which is a document giving me permission to speak with whoever is on the form – so it might be an ROI to speak to a teacher, a family member, a friend, or a doctor about you (the client). In the state of Washington, if the you as the client are over the age of 13, then I would need a ROI to speak to your parents about you, even if they are bringing you to therapy and you live with them.
After all the paperwork is completed and signed, then we move on to the good stuff! During the first session I might ask you more questions than I would in later sessions. In the first session I am trying to get a clear picture of what is happening with you (and/or your child), why you are coming to see me, what you feel are contributing factors to the problems. I might want to know when certain things are happening, and what’s happening before and after. I want to know about your relationship with other family members and friends. And most importantly I want to know what you want to get out of therapy and coming to see me.
The first session is a chance for me to get to know you, and it’s also a chance for you to get to know me. You don’t have to answer anything I ask, and, you are also welcome to ask me questions (though, I don’t have to answer everything you ask either). There’s not much point to therapy if we just don’t fit well and you don’t like me or feel comfortable with me, or vise versa. So hopefully we can figure this out within the first session. Sometimes people just don’t mesh – and it’s better to be honest and deal with it up front – you will get the most out of therapy with a therapist who you feel comfortable with, and feel you are able to talk to. Hopefully that’s me, but if it’s not, I am happy to help you find someone who you fit with.
Q. What’s a typical session like?
A. There is no typical session! I’m sure you expected something like that, and it’s true, sessions vary from person to person and from day to day. In general, you can expect that you will come in and I will ask how the previous week (or however long) has been since our last session. If I gave you some sort of homework or something to work on, I’ll ask how that went. But beyond that, it’s hard to say what’s typical. If you are a parent and your child is my client, we may check in in the beginning and end, and I’ll meet with your child for the middle. I am here for you, so we can do whatever (almost) you want to do. If you’ve been cooped up in a classroom all day and can’t stand to sit in an office, let’s go for a walk. Play therapy, drawing, sand tray, games, talking, shouting, laughing, crying…it’s all up to you what you want to do.
Q. Don’t therapists just say “Tell me how you feel about that?”
A. I won’t lie, there are times when I do say those 7 little words – because I honestly want to know what you are feeling. But that is not the crux of the way I work. I can’t speak for every therapist, but you won’t find me simply sitting saying “tell me more…how do you feel about that…ah hah…very interesting…tell me more….” I have a dynamic way of interacting with my clients to move forward and create change. yahoo!
Q. So what exactly do you do?
A. Okay, again a difficult question to answer depending on the person and the situation. Guess I’ll break this into age group and see how it goes from there…
With younger children we might draw, play with the doll house, use the sand tray, or act things out. I might help parents work on emotional coaching, and even practice in the office. Depending on the situation, we might also talk about explosive children and how to work with them. Children express themselves through play – I help to facilitate the process. I might point out what I see, ask questions, or set things up to see how the child plays it out – all to help the child move through the issue.
With Teens, we’ll talk about you, what’s going on in your life, school, family, friends. We can draw or do the sand tray, or whatever you want. Bring in some music, lets talk about it. We’ll talk about how you feel about things, how you react to them…and how to deal with them.
Adults, we’ll talk about your hopes and dreams, where you are now, and where you want to be. What’s holding you back and what do you need to move forward. What are you holding on to? Let’s talk about it, process it, move it through and go beyond.
It’s so hard to say what’s we’ll do in therapy because it’s totally dependent on you. I can tell you that I will gently nudge you in areas that you may not have looked at, and will encourage you to move beyond your comfort zone, but it will always be in a safe and supportive atmosphere with your healing in mind.
Q. My teen doesn’t want to go to counseling, but I think it could be helpful? How do I handle this?
A. It is pretty common for a parent to bring up counseling and for a teen to be resistant. Or more often, the teen is open at the first conversation, but then the parent schedules an appointment and all of a sudden the teen is saying “I don’t need help” and refuses to go.
As a parent, make sure your teen knows that it does not mean anything is wrong with them to go to counseling. I’m here to provide support and help. Also, I get that the life of a teen is very private – many don’t like the idea of coming and telling someone they don’t know what is going on in their lives – and that is totally fine! You only need to tell me what you want to tell me – and if you don’t want to talk about this or that, again, totally fine. Bring in your ipod and lets talk about your favorite music, I might ask you to cut some things out of a magazine, or anything you feel like doing. I am not here to tell you what to do, or to act as another parent or teacher – I’m here for you. period.
Most teens like coming to see me – I am younger than their parents, but older than their friends, and can relate on their level. I am not going to BS you, or placate you – and I will call you out if needed – but I will also listen to you in a way that most adults don’t and be your biggest fan.
Q. What is your hourly rate?
A. Washington State law prohibits therapists to post their hourly rate on the internet (weird, huh.). But give me a call or shoot me an email and we can talk about it. I am always williing to work with families in need to come to an agreeable solution. robyn@thriving-child.com
