Seattle Child Therapy – Thriving Child Blog

Summer’s here…time to stop counseling?

Often parents and families back off of counseling in the summer. It’s a pretty common phenomenon, that when kids aren’t in school then they aren’t having problems. That’s a gross over generalization of course, but in essence it’s true – the struggles over homework, bullying, or getting up in the morning are no longer an issue; families tend to have less going on so time schedules are more relaxed (i.e. parents are more patient), and (at least in Seattle) it seems like everyone is in a better mood when the sun is out.

So why bother with counseling, right? Don’t rock the boat, don’t poke the bear, if it ain’t broke don’t fix it – tempting and all viable options when we are just appreciating a summer of less drama, meltdowns, or fights. But, summer can be the perfect time for a kiddo to address underlying issues without the day to day drama. It’s also a great time for parents and families to practice ways of communicating and dealing with each other when there is less pressure or emphasis on things that are going wrong.

Everyone knows I’m big on noticing and articulating the things that your kids are doing right. Well, what better time to practice than when lots of things are going well…really well? You can get in lots of practice, try things different ways, and strengthen your relationship with your child so you’ve got a great base for the start of the school year..when things can get tricky again with homework, curfew, etc.

I also find the summer a great time to help kids focus on themselves and work on self esteem. The day to day grind of school for many kids is filled with criticism, judgment, comparisons, and self-loathing; add some bulling and feelings of “I should be this…” and “I’m not good enough because of that…” and it can seriously wear down self-esteem, feelings of self worth and competence and success, and then, by the way, can affect behavior and deteriorate relationships (sound familiar?). So, again, taking the time during the summer when the negative mental tape doesn’t get played everyday to help build how your child feels about himself/herself and the positive thoughts they say to themselves can go a long way into improving things for next school year.

And, just to finish up – families are busy busy busy during the school year. In between school/work, sports practices and piano lessons, weekly therapy sessions for some can be a strain. But in the summer, it just seems like there is more time. Just make sure you aren’t tempted to miss your session to play hookie at the beach. You might even want to consider scheduling counseling sessions in the morning so that you can have the rest of the day to do as you (or your teen) will.

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